Grubby stevedore OCS with more than my share of scars, looking for mincing, whining, open-bottom, wide-wale, seadog wanna-be with bright eyes and metal orthodontia.  While the storm whips up from the East, I'll batten your hatch to a fare-thee-well. "Heave-to, Matey... and belay your retainer." MM423

You were on BART last Wednesday at 9:45 p.m. You looked at me as if to say "Are you?"  Well, I am, but I said nothing and got off at the University Avenue stop.  Later that night I fantasized what I might have done if you would have let me. . I'm sooo glad I got off that bus   MM312    

I heard a lot of stories and I reckon they are true about how girls are put upon by men. I know I mustn't fall into the pit. But when I'm with a feller I forgit. I'm just a girl who can't say no. I'm in a terrible fix. I always say "Come on, let's go," just when I oughta' say "Nix."            WM123

Will-O-The-Wisp mintyboy with sister's hand -me- down wardrobe will "put on a show" for the right eager Jock (18-22) must be a real Jock (Rugby, Football, or Wrestling) Golf and/or Tennis Jocks need not apply unless they are 9"+ and drive a Renault Dauphine.    MM152

A crowd of Iraqi men, fresh from Baghdad, unshaved, unwashed, beating their breasts in a self-flagellatory frenzy. One glances at me and bares his teeth. I see him reach into his pocket and pull out his... Oh, OH! OH, GOD! - whew wow! -  Thanks for watching.   MM341  

Doggone it! Why can't I find that special dreamboat that will make me melt like an Eskimo Pie on a hotplate? Chunky Aleut, sans husky, seeks harpooner with whale, but no blubber.  Fish at my ice hole and I promise you'll pull in the "Catch Of The Day" Nanookey of the North.           MM634

Ever dream of having a hot, oily bed session with one of the Backstreet Boys?  Well, dream on, Silly. I'm a nervous, closeted guy who alternates between wild boy fantasies and deep anger toward my father, a Franciscan Friar. No, he's not a chicken.  MM721

 Mirth in the morning? Amusement in the afternoon? Fun in February?  Delight in the Deli? Laughter in the Lavatory? Bliss in Beds, Baths, and Beyond? Passion in the Ping's Poodle Pogoda. Alliterative Poet seeks Prozac Partner. MM023

Tenured PHD with all day to wait for you to call me. I like long walks, say, from San Diego to Compton, and enjoy occasional beatings by disaffected Asian Engineering students. I grade on a curve, and so should you.  Wear thick glasses if you want my "A"     MM233 

Older, distinguished African-American gentlemen, tired of appearing in medallion on front of rice box seeks big, beautiful African-American woman with bandana and a way with hotcakes. "I got your syrup, Sweet Thing. You got my waffles?"  . MW743

Thick hot meat. Much bigger than the rest and in your mouth in a minute. Wrap your lips around it and go for it!  Guaranteed you'll want more when the juice drips down your chin. Don't say I didn't warn you...      Shensons Corned Beef Sandwiches!   $6.99 

Buff, athletic dude with "chicken-in-the -basket" looking for French and Heinz 57 on the side.  Oh, yeah, gimme' a Mountain Dew with that and the Chocolate Cheesecake on a stick. Wait a minute, make that a McFlurry.       Dave - the guy driving his Dad's RX7  MF31